Posts
California's family court system has a reputation for ignoring the rights of biological fathers (even when the biological mothers suffer from documented substance abuse and/or mental illness problems that endanger the children). Shockingly, today California resident and pop star Britney Spears lost custody of her two young children to her ex-husband after demonstrating a longstanding pattern of irresponsible behavior and substance abuse. Could this mean the tides are finally turning and California's family courts are finally starting to assess biological parents using equitably-applied standards? Let's hope so, for the sake of the children as well as their fathers and stepmothers.
This is just a quick little quote that I read and felt it was fitting for my situation with my stepson, as well as to any other stepmothers out there.
"Not flesh of my flesh
Nor bone of my bone,
But still miraculously my own.
Never forget for a single minute,
You didn't grow under my heart,
But in it."
I started this group to locate and communicate with stepmothers who are active on Vox--particularly stepmothers without biological children, who often experience stepmothering in quite a different way from stepmothers who also have biological children.
I also wanted to use this group as an online location for posting, tips, tools, and items of interest to stepmothers who do not have biological kids. These stepmoms are sometimes called "childless stepmoms" (although everyone seems to agree that this term sounds like an oxymoron and causes some confusion.) So I opted for the longer group name of "Stepmothers Without Biological Children" to be specific.
I am a 32 year old stepmother to an awesome 15 year old boy whom I love dearly and admire. I have been his stepmom since he was age 9. We have a very harmonious and close relationship that brings happiness to my life. I am fortunate--many blended families don't blend so well.
Our life has changed in recent years in that my stepson now lives with us during the school year and then spends Winter Break and summertime with his biological mother on the opposite coast of the United States. The arrangement used to be that my stepson lived with his biological mother and stepfather most of the school year and then spent Winter Break and 5 weeks of the summer with us. We prefer the current arrangement instead, which gives us more time with my stepson and also exposes him to the advantages of a better school system.
That's a brief snapshot of me...now what about you?
This information about a survey and research study about stepmothering issues was brought to my attention by another stepmoms' group but I wanted to share it here.
If you would like to share some of your stepparenting experiences and provide some anonymous demographic data, you can contribute to this study and help all stepmothers learn more about stepparenting in America.
Here is information on how to participate:
The University of Buffalo - part of the State University of New York
system-- is conducting research regarding the differences in experiences
and satisfaction between stepmoms who do and do not have biological
children.This is the first study we know of that is specifically targeting the
role of the stepmother without biological children.Please pass the link to all stepmoms you know in
person and on other boards.All a participant needs to do is fll out a short survey.
The address for the study is:
http://www.surveymo nkey.com/ s.asp?u=37141167 7003Please cut and paste the link if it does not work correctly.